Planning your wedding day can be quite a stressful process. While the wedding day itself is usually an amazing day it doesn’t mean that everything about the organising is so great. There may be difficult decisions to make along the way. Everything from the table settings to the wedding party may raise eyebrows among your friends and family. What you need to consider when choosing your bridesmaids can feel like a minor task in the scheme of the big day. However, by following this guide you can make the right decision and feel supported on your big day.
Ask your own sisters / close relatives
It can be temping to ONLY ask your friends. While this may seem a good idea initially you may want someone with that blood / family tie. They may be more likely to make the effort to support you throughout the run up to your wedding. Also, they will already know a number of people in your wedding party. This can make the day run smoother and help with communication before your wedding day.
Consider the cost of dresses when choosing your bridesmaids
Obviously everything about a wedding is expensive. If you let it be. Now you could go down the traditional route and provide the dresses and shoes for your bridesmaids. Then you’ll also want transportation for them as well as hair stylists and make-up artists to ensure they look flawless in your photographs. Another option that you could do is to have your bridesmaids provide their own dress and shoes. They could stick to a specific colour theme, or you could provide them with some options. It can be frowned upon to ask people to do this, however, if you are on a tight budget then those people that truly care about you will be happy (ish!) to make the effort.
Don’t feel obligated to ask somebody
It isn’t compulsory, or even traditional, to ask somebody specific to be your bridesmaid. If you were a bridesmaid for a friend or relative it doesn’t mean that they need to be one for you in return. While they may be slightly upset at not being asked they might also be relieved! Not everybody wants the obligation of being involved in a wedding party for an entire day and posing for numerous photographs.
Be realistic about what you want of your bridesmaids
If you want your bridesmaids just to be there on the day then fantastic. However, if you expect more of them then be clear about what it is that you want. Set out your requirements from the beginning and ensure that each bridesmaid is happy to be involved and wants to help you in this manner. This helps to keep things fun throughout and let everybody know what is expected of them when they accept your bridesmaid invitation.
Choose responsible bridesmaids
Try and avoid somebody who is going to get drunk by 2pm and ruin your photographs. Likewise think about anyone who might embarrass you in other ways. Avoid people who are always late and forgetful too. You don’t want a bridesmaid turning up without coordinating shoes or forgetting one of the things you require assistance with.
Think about people who are going to procreate
This is a bit of a controversial one I’m sure. However, think about people due to start their own family. Do you really want someone who is 8.5 months pregnant standing all day in your wedding party? Would they really want to? If someone you have already asked becomes pregnant then don’t ostracise them. Embrace it. Be happy for them. Be welcoming. Make adjustments to their dress so they don’t have to drop out of your wedding party. However – give them the option. If a friend has a new baby due around the time of your wedding then let them know it is ok if they want to avoid being part of your wedding party. This may relieve some of the stress for them.